How to Talk to Your Mom: Step 1

You know her, you love her, but it's not always easy to talk to her.

Who is it? It's your mom.

The Pink Locker Society has received 25,000 questions in the last year and lots of those questions have something to do with mothers.

Like...I really need a bra but I can't ask my mom. Or...I want to shave my legs but my mom won't let me. And...I think I'm going to get my period soon, but I'm afraid to say anything to my mom.

Of course, these topics are a little embarrassing. You might not feel super comfortable leaping into a talk with mom about the PBBs (periods, bras, and boys). Maybe you and your mom have NEVER talked about this kind of stuff ever before. So I say start out with something easier. Find ways to get a tiny bit closer to your mom.

Here's great way to begin. Write down five things you like about your mom - five compliments. Then ask her if she'll do the same for you. Here's the first one I wrote for my mom:

1. I like how you decorate our house for every holiday. (Seriously, the woman goes over the top every time.)

Please comment below to share some of the compliments you gave your mom - and let us know the nice things she said about you!

The five-compliment idea comes from Dove. Dove is the same company that puts REAL women in its ads, so I already like them. And Dove is doing a huge new push to promote girl self-esteem (that's you, feeling great about yourself).

Ask your mom if you and she can do something special together during Dove Self-Esteem Weekend on October 22-24. Get more info at the Dove Movement site. And I'll be posting more mom-daughter tips over the next few weeks.

Think pink!
Jemma

46 Comments:

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Anonymous Josie said...

That's cool!

October 6, 2010 at 7:43 PM  
Anonymous HarshMommy (kinda) said...

im kinda have a problem with that, too! Anyone wanna give us advice???

October 6, 2010 at 7:44 PM  
Anonymous Mickayla said...

Dear Jemma,
My mom and I don't get along at all. We argue everyday but I can still talk to her about anything at all. I want to know how to get our

bond closer. Your answer is appreciated. Really I would like for you to answer back.
From,
Mickayla
(Scared for period)

October 6, 2010 at 7:44 PM  
Blogger Jemma said...

I know all about mom arguments. But I also want to be close with my mom. Why not give her 5 compliments - maybe write them down on a homemade card? And see what happens next.

Can she think of five things she likes about you? I hope so! Let us know how it goes!
Think pink!
Jemma

October 6, 2010 at 7:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Jemma,
U no with the PLS books r they available in Australia cause i hav looked at every bookstore that i can and i cant find the books!!! And if they arent in Australia at the moment when r they coming?

October 6, 2010 at 7:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

when you have shocking news you should go easy or can be some one who comes straight out just out with the words or have im
just saying

October 6, 2010 at 7:46 PM  
Anonymous Maryanne said...

Jemma, my mom was scolded me because last week I got C-. How to say sorry to my mom?

October 6, 2010 at 7:46 PM  
Anonymous Jane said...

Just tell her with confidence and try to be calm. When I got my period, my mother calmed me down and told me soothing things, so it got easier to talk to her. Good luck to you guys who still haven't been able to talk to your moms easily about this stuff, though!

October 6, 2010 at 7:47 PM  
Anonymous Mickayla said...

Dear Jemma,
Thanks for the advice. My mom and I get along now(not as much as most girls and their moms though). Once again, thank you for the advice.
From,
Mickayla
(Scared for period)

October 6, 2010 at 7:47 PM  
Anonymous mariyah said...

that's what i do, when ever my mom is looking for her stuff like bras and stuff I just go up to her and say "oh mom I think IM growing up and i need one of these." hope my advice helps.

October 6, 2010 at 7:48 PM  
Anonymous Daniella said...

uum well next time you go shopping wid her convince her to go into a undies store while she looks round nfind a bra ur size try it on then show ya mom she should see it fits

October 6, 2010 at 7:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

can some1 answer Question Gals Question I am having the same problem!!!!

October 6, 2010 at 7:49 PM  
Anonymous Symphoy said...

i would just come to her straight

October 6, 2010 at 7:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

can u plz update ur blog more often!

October 6, 2010 at 7:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

should i talk to my mum about my crush?

(its hard u know!!!!)

October 6, 2010 at 7:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

can u answer the questions?

uv only answered 1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

October 6, 2010 at 7:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i need help. my dad and mom talked to me about periods, but i need to know more and i dont want to ask them. right now im in the area of getting a period.what do i do?

October 6, 2010 at 7:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

moms just dont under stand

October 7, 2010 at 4:57 PM  
Anonymous GrammarGeek said...

Hey-o!
It depends who you mom is and how good of a relationship you have with her. Than, basing your decision on that, you can decide when and how to ask her. I'm always afraid she'll crash the car (out of shock) if i tell her something like that while she's driving. Try just before bed. than you can go to sleep and wake up in the morning feeling fresh and proud that you did it. I find that it's just starting thats hard. Once you get going, everything is so much easier. Mentally prepare yourself. Think about what to say and how. Visualize it, and know it.

Hope i helped and that i wasn't too bossy!

October 11, 2010 at 2:31 AM  
Anonymous Kathryn said...

Hey Jemma,

I have a couple of problems:

*I have budding breasts but my Mom doesn't think I need a bra even though I've asked her and

* I have REALLY hairy legs and my Dad thinks I need to start shaving but my Mom doesn't. What can I do about either of them?

What can I do?
Kathryn

October 20, 2010 at 8:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Jemma,

i have a problem that i am sick of! help me!plz

Most of my enimies in my class (grade 6) are always talking about me behind my back and saying "she has to wear a bra" and i ask my mom but she says that "no u dont need a bra" wat do i do?

plz plz help! (desparate person here)

October 21, 2010 at 5:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i have the same problem so i feel for u

October 21, 2010 at 5:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

my mum is one of those mums who tell people everything but i need to talk to her about PBB'S. help

October 27, 2010 at 5:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

well i love my mom were lik bffs can tlk to her bout anything but i dnt think she likes meh to lik boys the lady still thinks i lik seseme street amirah

October 30, 2010 at 2:19 AM  
Anonymous Zonique said...

I know what you're saying even though me and ymy mom are really really close I still have a VERY hard time talking to her. Go to another adult or and older sister(if you have one). I had to go to my Aunt about one of them and she took me and now my mom knows.

November 28, 2010 at 12:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

it was super embarrissing when i had to tell my mom that i got my period and when i told her i needed to shave. anyone have advice?

-lexa

December 28, 2010 at 10:45 PM  
Anonymous Viktoria said...

When i got my period i took out my undie that had blood on it, I came up to her and showed it.(she was all "sweetie pie")
Don't be afraid. Just visualize how you are going to tell her and do it.

January 6, 2011 at 8:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love my mom but im not very close to her at all. She isnt close to her mom either cause personal reasons.I cant talk to my mom about anything cause she gets all mad too easily and becomes a pain.She doesnt tell me im beautiful or complainment me or anything. other people like girls that I've grown up with are closer to her than I am and how she treats them and she doesnt get me and she judges me and doesnt tell me she loves me all the time. just feel hopeless.. I am very much alot close to my dad and he's my hero and a angel to me.

January 9, 2011 at 6:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My mom will not let me wear a bra but I need one. And all my friends wear them so feel so left out. What do I do.

January 9, 2011 at 9:12 PM  
Anonymous amp54 said...

one question me and mom constintly fight how am i suppose to talk to her if she wont listen.

January 15, 2011 at 12:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know how to approach my mom about wearing a bra, she seems like she doesn't want me to grow up. Any tips?

January 17, 2011 at 9:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i have a mom question thats acually up there:my mom wont let me shave my legs.i show her my legs and she says she doesnt see anything.i know its there really bad,cause i can see it,and im even made fun of for it!how can i tell her i NEED to shave really bad when she wont believe me?i have another question:ive had the first period symptoms for a month now but nothings happened.can you give me some advice?PS:im 11

February 13, 2011 at 1:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yuo know that my mom and i havent gotten along that well either. i know how you feel mikayla.

May 25, 2011 at 8:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just keep thinking she will be all like wat the heck why do u suddenly wanna start shaving should I tell her infront of my sis or what

July 27, 2011 at 10:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Jemma,
My parents got divorced 2 years ago & now my mom is remarried. And she's pregnant. I'm really mad at her for it. What should I do?

July 20, 2012 at 10:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Jemma,
I like this one boy and I don't know how to tell my mom about it. I also want to talk to her about dating boys. I'm scared it will be very awkward & she will tell my dad. PLEASE HELP ME?!

July 20, 2012 at 10:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just tell her you would feel more comfortable and confident if you would wear one. Usually when I talk to my mom about stuff like that, I ask her in the evening, when she tucks me in. But if she gets cranky at night, ask her at a private time during the day. Or casually ask her when she thinks you can get some when you pass them in the store. If you have an older sister who wears them

August 8, 2012 at 8:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ur older sis or gramma might b able to convince her.

August 8, 2012 at 8:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tell your mom u would feel more confident with one on. Maybe your older sister or your gramma would be able to convince her. As for the gossip, ignore it. They are looking for a reaction. Nor matter what anyone says, you are beautiful. šŸ˜Š

August 8, 2012 at 8:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I honestly wouldn't. But all that matters is confiding in someone you trust. Don't tell some one if u think they might tell some one. But be prepared, she might tell your father.

August 8, 2012 at 8:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Remind her that you will try really hard to keep your grades up and one bad grade probably won't affect your final grade too much. And that you are human. No one is perfect. She has probably gotten a C on a test before too.

August 8, 2012 at 8:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And say you are sorry a lot

August 8, 2012 at 8:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

my mom compliments:(!)

1. i love the way she folds my clothes and washes them as if its as easy as.....something easy...(?)
2. i love the way no matter what she does it always seams clean sented and beautiful
3. and i love that she`s doesnt get too involved in my personal life issues even though she sounded like that kind of mother from the last 2 points.

point number 3 is what makes it hard for me to ever talk to her about pb`s ( i dont feel the need to talk to her about boys)

March 10, 2013 at 12:12 PM  
Anonymous PurplePuppy said...

can u giv a list wih ways 2 talk?

April 21, 2013 at 2:37 AM  
Anonymous PurplePuppy said...

O.K heres 1 way:
Get ur croptop (if u hav 1) go 2 her wen she alone say: 'Mom, my croptop's a bit tite canwe go shop to get a bigga size?' and wen u at th shop get a bra andtry it wen she reelizes its abra say 'is it? its so comfy we still gt it?'
hope this hlps xx

April 21, 2013 at 3:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've never been on one of these sights before but I really am needing help talking to my mom. We NEVER get along and I find it very hard to open up to her because she gets so mad very easily I feel like I'm walking on eggshells when we talk. I've been trying to be more open with her because she gets mad that I'm not but then when I do she gets mad about whatever I tell her and then we fight and it seems like we never resolve our problems. Part of the reason is because I get really quiet when I'm frustrated and I don't want to make the situation worse. I almost get choked up like I have stage fright and I was wondering if anyone has any tips or suggestions on how I could work on that?

June 3, 2014 at 12:28 AM  

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