When sadness stays too long

We've had a few recent comments from girls who feel sad. Sometimes there's a clear reason, like when a loved one has died. Other times, it's hard to say why they feel upset and unhappy.

You may have heard the word "depressed" or "depression." You might have heard someone say, "I'm so depressed." Lots of people feel sad from time to time. Maybe you didn't make the team you wanted to make or your secret crush started dating someone else.

But depression is also a word that doctors and psychologists use to describe a condition when someone feels really sad for a long time. A depressed person often doesn't feel like doing her usual stuff, even the stuff that she ordinarily likes to do.

You can find out more about sadness here: Why Am I So Sad?

And if you or someone you know feels this way, it's VERY important to tell a parent or another adult who can help. Can't tell mom or dad? Then start with a school counselor, your doctor, a grandparent, kind aunt or even your best friend's mom.

Think pink!


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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you Jemma so much for posting this. I told my mom that I had been feeling depressed for a few days in a row and I kept staying up to almost 3:00am crying and she asked if I wanted to see a doctor. I said maybe. But then it went away for a couple of days and now I feel like it's coming back. I know for a fact that it's not mood swings because I know what those feel like. I feel ridiculous because I know a good fraction of the sadness is that I'm really self-conscious and I have a problem with my body image. The other fraction is this utterly frustrating health problem that is uber embarrassing- bed wetting... I'M 12!!!! I am going through a really tough time so thank you so much because the inly 2 things I can turn to are my mom and this website.

I'm really confused?

August 3, 2012 at 1:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes, definitely tell your parents! My uncle has severe depression and it is a long story. People can help this! He is feeling much better now, and I am very grateful.

August 3, 2012 at 4:42 PM  
Blogger Jemma said...

@Vlad, you asked whether you should see the school counselor. I think it's a good place to start for any kid who is feeling overwhelmed. In other words, it's MUCH better than trying to figure everything out on your own. :)

August 3, 2012 at 6:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My friends grandma is going through depression.

August 3, 2012 at 6:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Omg I'm 12 too! I am always depressed because my sister and parents try to say a joke but they make fun of me! Also I'm part of the so called popular people and no one will leave me out of the drama even over summer I'm getting texts! Idk what to do plz someone help!

August 4, 2012 at 8:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think one of my friends is depressed. I think she is bipolar which causes depression, i think. But she is really self concious because she thinks she is overweight.

Then I have another friend who says she is depressed but I know that she is just saying that for attention.

August 5, 2012 at 6:18 AM  
Anonymous Vlad ;) said...

Oh my god Jemma thank you so much for responding to my comment. I thought nobody would. You're right, i should go talk to the school counselor about my depression because it will take FOREVER to figure it out on my own. Thanks again, Vlad.

August 5, 2012 at 1:01 PM  
Anonymous Warrior Fireheart said...

Thank you for posting this!!!!!!! I've been really depressed ever since my best friend died of cancer about 6 months ago, this was really helpful, but I still can't get him out of mind, I really miss him... may he R.I.P. :(

August 7, 2012 at 3:45 PM  
Anonymous I can't wait 'til school starts!!! said...

Hey girls! If you are sad about being the "most undeveloped", dry your tears! Adults are always wanting to look younger, and kids are always trying to look older. enjoy childhood while it lasts, girls! Kids can physically do many more things than adults can, like gymnastics. Learn to trust who you are, and if anyone makes you feel bad, remember this "I'm me and nobody else can change it". Hope I helped!

August 8, 2012 at 12:19 PM  
Anonymous bubbles said...

@Warrior Fireheart:
Oh, that's so sad. :( Maybe you could do something to help other people with cancer: Pennies for Patients, charity walks, other stuff. R.I.P Warrior Fireheart's friend

August 8, 2012 at 12:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

to be honest sometimes i fell this way because i think 2 much about my crush

August 8, 2012 at 10:33 PM  
Anonymous Warrior Fireheart said...

@Bubbles I have done those fundraisers, but I still don't feel any better, I can't forget him, these wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just to real, there's just too much that time cannot erase (sorry for the song reference). I remember my mom came up to me the day he died, and said he wont be coming over today, he's with god now, my parents said I shouldn't go to his funeral because it would be to overwhelming for me, so I didn't. But then a week later, during math class, I found his picture in my binder, and my eyes got all watery, then the teacher asked if I was okay, and I ran out of the room crying with a friend close behind me. Now since then, I haven't been eating and sleeping well. If only he was still here. Now whenever anyone talks about him, I start crying, and when I hear the songs My Immortal and Hello by Evanescence, I think of him.

August 10, 2012 at 5:31 PM  
Anonymous jessica said...

Tell your family that it hurts your feelings and theyll proabably stop.

August 11, 2012 at 11:46 PM  
Anonymous neither can i!!! said...

@I can't wait 'til school starts!!!,

that was honestly the most amazing advice and thought anyone could share. Its beautiful...

I suggest we should start thinking like that girls.. smile if you agree :D

heh.. i do!!!!!!!

August 16, 2012 at 1:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree too!

August 17, 2012 at 3:52 PM  
Anonymous Juliett said...

In life you are going to be lied to, talked about, and used but you have to decide whose worth your tears and who isn't.

August 25, 2012 at 1:37 PM  
Anonymous jessica said...

I love school 2!!!

August 27, 2012 at 5:30 PM  
Anonymous Born2Bme said...

Well, i think you should talk to your mother, father, or a school councelor about it. It will help you so much! if u cant do it, take deep breathes and make ur self say it. thats what i do! when im sorta afraid to ask something, i just make myself blurt it out. cuz how i see it: once u say the first word, theres not turning back. i like to ask them at night, or early in the morning. hope i help!

August 27, 2012 at 11:04 PM  
Anonymous Tristen said...

When you realize that you can't be happy,no matter what,you might be depressed.When you are feeling this way,you should tell a trusted adult,or talk to school counselor.Also,try thinking of happy thoughts or good memories.

September 4, 2012 at 7:35 PM  
Anonymous Cutiecake123 said...

I feel so self conscious around my friends because they are skinny and pretty and normal-short. I am the tallest and overweight. I feel like giant. Whenever I pass people kids in the hallway i look directly down at the ground and hope they don't look at me. No ones ever had a crush on me either. I can't blame them though. I have acne and glasses and my nose looks gigantic. I just wanted to know, am I the only one that feels on the outside looking in?

September 4, 2012 at 7:57 PM  
Anonymous Juliett said...

To Cutiecake123:

Cutiecake, don't feel like that:( i bet you're beautiful and any guy would be lucky to go out with you. If people are mean, then they are just jealous of how nice of a person you are. Guys do have crushes on you they just too shy to tell you. You are the perfect height and you are pretty and you should be happy of who you are because God made you and he is always looking out for you even on your worst days:) If i went to your school i would be best friends with you. You are not the only person who feels like that i know for a fact that everyone of your friends feels the exact same way and they are asking themselves the same question:) Keep your head up and smile everyday:)

September 9, 2012 at 1:41 PM  
Anonymous Cutiecake123 said...

@ Juliett

Oh my gosh you just TOTALLY made me feel better. Thank you so much. Your right! I'll try to keep my head up thank you so much!

September 10, 2012 at 5:01 PM  
Anonymous Warrior Fireheart said...

Okay, I really need help. I like this guy, and I finally found my courage to go up and ask him if he likes me today, but when I did, he said " I want nothing to do with you, I hate you, and want you out of my life!" Even though he said that, I still like him, why do I,?Why don't I hate him?

September 11, 2012 at 9:15 PM  
Anonymous Oneinamillion said...

@Warrior Fireheart

I had the same problem as you. I liked this guy, and he said he liked me too but then after he wouldn't even talk to me, and most days he couldn't even look at me. It was then I realized something.

Most people don't know how to react when you tell them you have a crush on them. Whenever someone tells me that, I am speechless. He was probably caught off guard, or had a seriously bad day. The point is, you shouldn't take it personally and if he meant what he said, you should try to move on. Instead of focusing on the things you like about him, focus about on the things you like about another guy. You shouldn't dwell on one boy, there are plenty of others that would treat you waaayyy better than him. Unless he apologizes, move on, you can't stand by while people say that to you. It just shows others that you don't care how they treat you. You should move on, and hey, who knows, maybe you will find the perfect guy afterward, and this guy will be wishing he treat you better. If it helps, make a list of every single person who loves you, including friends family members, anyone. There's probably a few other guys out there who like you, and you should focus on finding them!

Good luck! ;)

September 12, 2012 at 10:29 PM  
Anonymous Juliett said...

Cutiecake 123:

Your welcome! anytime:)

September 13, 2012 at 9:18 PM  
Anonymous kayjay06 said...

well I will tell you I get emotional all the time so trust me i know how it feels... but i mean things happen for a reason. I hope this helps ya!

October 25, 2012 at 6:27 PM  
Anonymous kewlkittykat said...

yeah every thing that happens has a purpose. don't worry i'm very emotional so i know what it like

December 20, 2012 at 5:09 PM  
Anonymous AnnyaWillRockYourWorld said...

I think I have some serious sychic (is that how u spell it?)problems
One night I got really scared that I started crying and screaming and I got a feeling that my parents were ghosts or something and somehow slept.
From that day onwards whenever my mind is blank whatever I do or say comes in slow motion
I don't know why
It always takes a few minutes for that creepy feeling to go away
I have learned to keep that feeling away but I wonder if it is a serious problem
Should I see a sychatrist?

June 1, 2013 at 9:53 AM  

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